Tag Archive: floptajoe


monkeyhorse4

We at Floptajoe.com don’t claim to be experts when it comes to the sport of kings, but on the back of four profitable Cheltenham festivals in a row, we decided to make our selections available to our adoring public.

The team have painstakingly trawled through hundreds of back-alley tipping sites, listened to the jockeys and stalked the trainers to bring you the best and most profitable tips for free!

As the Cheltenham festival progresses, we’ll keep you up to date with real-time tweets on @Floptajoe and will be updating this blog to keep track of how we’re doing.

We said Day Three would be different, it was worse again. It’s been one of those weeks where nothing is going right.

Here’s where the remaining pennies are going today!

DAY FOUR  – Friday, March 14th

1.30 – TRIUMPH HURDLE

  • Guitar Pete – E/W –  9/1 

2.05 – COUNTY HURDLE

  •  Upazo – E/W – 33/1

2.40 – ALBERT BARTLETT NOVICES’ HURDLE

  • King’s Palace – WIN – 3/1 

3.20 – CHELTENHAM GOLD CUP

  • Bob’s worth – WIN – 7/4 – Last Instalment is 10/1  if you’re looking for value!

4.00 – FOXHUNTERS’ CHASE

  • Bertie’s Dream – E/W – 16/1 

4.40 – MARTIN PIPE HANDICAP HURDLE

  • Vieux Lion Rouge – E/W – 15/2 

5.15 – GRAND ANNUAL HANDICAP CHASE

  • Ned Buntline – E/W – 7/1

***** Best of luck! *****

Check out our friends at BookieInsiders.co for even more tips!

Check out our friends at BookieInsiders.co for even more tips!

*Prices are correct at time of posting, as always, never bet more than you can afford to lose.

MonkeyHorse3

We at Floptajoe.com don’t claim to be experts when it comes to the sport of kings, but on the back of four profitable Cheltenham festivals in a row, we decided to make our selections available to our adoring public.

The team have painstakingly trawled through hundreds of back-alley tipping sites, listened to the jockeys and stalked the trainers to bring you the best and most profitable tips for free!

As the Cheltenham festival progresses, we’ll keep you up to date with real-time tweets on @Floptajoe and will be updating this blog to keep track of how we’re doing.

We said Day Two would be different, it was worse. Our only comfort is that no one else seems to be doing any better!

Maybe we should stop calling them ‘tips’ and refer to them as ‘suggestions’ but having said that, Thursday’s betting should improve things.

 

DAY THREE  – Thursday, March 13th

1.30 – JLT NOVICES CHASE

  • Wonderful Charm – E/W –  11/2 – Difficult to go against Felix Yonger, but we’re really confident in this horse at the business end of the race.

2.05 – PERTEMPS FINAL H’CAP HURDLE

  •  Uncle Jimmy – E/W – 20/1 – A lot of contenders here, Uncle Jimmy is a crazy price though and should be there or thereabouts.

2.40 – RYANAIR CHASE

  • Benefficient – E/W – 4/1 – Great horse and amid doubts about Dynaste, it has to be the obvious choice.

3.20 – WORLD HURDLE

  • Annie Power – WIN – 6/4 – Can’t look beyond this selection here. If you don’t fancy the short odds, take a look at Salubrious at 25/1.

4.00 – BYRNE GROUP PLATE

  • Tap Night – E/W – 12/1 – Cracking horse, strong contender.

4.40 – KIM MUIR HANDICAP CHASE

  • Causes As Causes – E/W – 7/1 – Narrowly beaten in last two races but looks to be showing some real form.

5.15 – CHARITY RACE

  • No idea here, won’t be backing this unless we have some serious winnings from the previous races. 

***** Watch out for Day Four coming soon. Best of luck! *****

Check out our friends at BookieInsiders.co for even more tips!

Check out our friends at BookieInsiders.co for even more tips!

*Prices are correct at time of posting, as always, never bet more than you can afford to lose.

horsemonkey-day2

We at Floptajoe.com don’t claim to be experts when it comes to the sport of kings, but on the back of four profitable Cheltenham festivals in a row, we decided to make our selections available to our adoring public.

The team have painstakingly trawled through hundreds of back-alley tipping sites, listened to the jockeys and stalked the trainers to bring you the best and most profitable tips for free!

As the Cheltenham festival progresses, we’ll keep you up to date with real-time tweets on @Floptajoe and will be updating this blog to keep track of how we’re doing.

It was a rough first day with only one win and two places to our name so far. Assuming you placed a significant amount on the Quevega sure thing (as I did), you should be breaking even and ready to reinvest again!

Day two will be different.

DAY TWO  – Wednesday, March 12th

1.30 – NEPTUNE NOVICES’ HURDLE

  • Red Sherlock – WIN –  4/1 – Temperamental horse with a great record. Short price so you may consider Shanahan’s Turn as a cheeky each-way option at 50/1.

2.05 – RSA CHASE

  •  Ballycasey – E/W – 5/1 – A Ruby ride here and should win.

2.40 – CORAL CUP HANDICAP HURDLE

  • Sadler’s Risk – E/W – 25/1 – Difficult race to call, of the shorter prices I would consider Bayan the one to beat at 10/1.

3.20 – QUEEN MOTHER CHAMPION CHASE

  • Captain Conan – E/W – 5/1 – Best bet of today, can’t see this losing. Kid Cassidy is an excellent each-way 11/1 option too.

4.00 – X COUNTRY HANDICAP CHASE

  • Big Shu – E/W – 5/1 – Consistency is the word here. Will be there come the end and has the experience to win it.

4.40 – FRED WINTER HANDICAP HURDLE

  • Violet Dancer – E/W – 20/1 – Bit of a lottery here, but this horse has been targeting this race for a long time.

5.15 – CHAMPION BUMPER

  • Our Kaempfer – E/W – 25/1 – Another long-odds punt, bit of luck and this horse could figure.

***** Watch out for Day Three coming soon. Best of luck! *****

Check out our friends at BookieInsiders.co for even more tips!

Check out our friends at BookieInsiders.co for even more tips!

*Prices are correct at time of posting, as always, never bet more than you can afford to lose.

horse1b

We at Floptajoe.com don’t claim to be experts when it comes to the sport of kings, but on the back of four profitable Cheltenham festivals in a row, we decided to make our selections available to our adoring public.

The team have painstakingly trawled through hundreds of back-alley tipping sites, listened to the jockeys and stalked the trainers to bring you the best and most profitable tips for free!

As the Cheltenham festival progresses, we’ll keep you up to date with real-time tweets on @Floptajoe and will be updating this blog to keep track of how we’re doing.

Enjoy the festival!

DAY ONE  – Tuesday, March 11th

1.30 – Supreme Novices’ Hurdle

  • Wicklow Brave – E/W –  13/2 – Favourites never win this race, and it is a large field. This highly rated horse will be in contention at the end and may be worth backing each-way at this price though his jumping is a concern.

2.05 – Arkle Chase

  •  Trifolium – WIN – 5/1 – Champagne Fever will be well backed on reputation alone. We stuck a few bob on Mozoltov antepost but hopes are slim at this stage as he’s no longer in this race! Trifolium looks a real prospect here.

2.40 – Baylis & Harding Handicap Chase

  • Time For Rupert – E/W – 25/1 – Always drawn towards Alfie Sherrin come festival time but Time For Rupert is great value here and has an excellent weight advantage.

3.20 – Champion Hurdle

  • Our Conor – WIN – 4/1Hurricane Fly is highly fancied as usual, but this is Our Conor‘s best opportunity to come out on top and who can forget his performance in the Triumph Hurdle last year?

4.00 – OLBG Mares’ Hurdle

  • Quevega – WIN – 4/6 – This doesn’t really qualify as a tip, so you may look for the each-way option here. We’re going for L’Unique at a tasty 25/1. Quevega will make history this year.

4.40 – National Hunt Chase

  • Suntiep – E/W – 8/1 – Can’t see any obvious winners in this group, but we like this horse and would expect a top 2/3 finish at least.

5.15 – Rewards4Racing Novices Handicap Chase

  • Festive Affair – E/W – 12/1 – Incredibly open field here, worth a small stakes punt.

***** Day 2 *****

Check out our friends at BookieInsiders.co for even more tips!

Check out our friends at BookieInsiders.co for even more tips!

*Prices are correct at time of posting, as always, never bet more than you can afford to lose.

Irish Hotel Signs

I’m reluctant to play into that Irish stereotype but as an Irishman, hard-hitting journalist and fan of incompetence, I thought I’d post this baffling piece of signage spotted in a Donegal hotel.

My sister sent these on to me following a short stay in An Chúirt in Gweedore.

Her room number was 225 and this was the first sign she encountered, which way would you go?

hotel2

The surprising answer is LEFT.

She encountered a similar problem shortly afterwards, bear in mind she’s still looking for 225!

hotel1

The answer is RIGHT.

Don’t worry, my sister found her room eventually and was only mildly inconvenienced. She probably had a lovely stay, I didn’t ask about that.

Was this worth posting? You decide!

Watch this space for hints and tips in the run up to Cheltenham 2014.

UPDATED!

horse1b

Day 1 – Cheltenham 2014

————————-

We ended last year’s festival in profit – Check out last years results below:

Cheltenham 2013 – Day 1

MonkeyHorse

Cheltenham 2013 – Day 2

horsemonkey-day2

Cheltenham 2013 – Day 3

MonkeyHorse3

Cheltenham 2013 – Day 4

monkeyhorse4

Misread on The Guardian

The Guardian homepage is often confusing. Drop your guard for even a moment and you can end up associating a photo with the wrong headline.

Once you start doing this on purpose, you have a new puerile hobby!

Guardian

 

Below are a few I’ve collected so far:

 

katemoss

3dpasta
malepill

mandela

mars

nationalists

nymphoto

oldtraff

shianews

Lauren

Scottish

Are you interested in a new way to waste your time?

Catch the latest misread articles on Twitter @floptajoe  #MisreadOnGuardian

Mixed Photos

Spacewalk in the park.

Spacewalk in the park.

G R A V I T Y

★★★★☆

Released: June 2013
Certificate: 12A
Director: Alfonso Cuarón

[THIS ARTICLE CONTAINS SPOILERS]

We’ve finally reached the point where CG looks real. Peter Jackson’s studio claimed we had reached that level 12 years ago during production of the  Lord of the Rings trilogy, but technology has moved on significantly and the odd cartoonish bit we all pretend not to see would not now be forgiven.

Gravity could not have been produced on the same scale until now, and the effect is genuinely awesome to behold. Spiraling and spinning, moving sickeningly from every conceivable angle over alarming distances, the viewer becomes immersed in space.

Every now and then it would shift – in manic computer game style – to the astronaut’s perspective which added to the feeling of sheer terror.

The effects take centre stage, and that’s just as well.

The story is secondary but simple –  Dr Ryan Stone (Sandra Bullock) goes on her first mission into space to fix a radio (or something), the shuttle is hit by debris and she must make it back to earth alone.

George Clooney plays the experienced brave, doomed, smart-alecky mission Lieutenant Matt Kowalski and most of the dialogue is between these two characters.

Their relationship and the script are rather disappointingly obvious. The by-the-numbers writing comes close to ruining the experience in that it’s neither boring enough to be the speech of dull space people nor interesting enough to engage us. Every anecdote or comment is called back later on almost by rote to remind us we’re watching someone’s composition.

“Hope I get to break Anatoly Solovyev’s spacewalk record.”

“Looks like I’ll have to break Anatoly Solovyev’s spacewalk record another time.”

“At appears as though I’ll break Anatoly Solovyev’s spacewalk record after all.”

As is often the case, the use of mega-famous actors  means that the viewer may end up empathizing less than they could have with unknowns. Much of this reviewer’s time was spent thinking ‘SANDRA-BULLOCK-IN-SPACE-SANDRA-BULLOCK-IN-SPACE-SANDRA-BULLOCK-IN-SPACE’ which meant I couldn’t really take her seriously.

But that’s my own bias.

Gravity is an extraordinary film despite it’s shortcomings and definitely worth the price of admission for the effects alone. However, like space, there’s very little weight to anything here.

Read more film reviews – HERE


Supe2

Man of Steel

Released: June 2013
Certificate: 12A
Director: Zack Snyder

[THIS ARTICLE CONTAINS SPOILERS]

The origin story everyone knows has just been retold. This wasn’t done in the tender fulfilling way the trailer suggested it would be, instead, we’re assaulted by incomprehensible action from the very beginning.

It appears as though the creators were concerned about recreating the dire Superman Returns and attempted to make this film as exciting as possible. There are no peaks and troughs, this venture begins with the destruction of a planet and takes it from there.

General Zod (Michael Shannon) suffers from a similar problem with his temper. He begins the film (on Krypton) boiling with an incandescent rage, travels several light-years presumably quietly discussing his plans with his comrades, then arrives at earth more furious than ever. It’s a wonder his minions show him such devotion as he’s surely quite difficult to live with.

Since almost everyone has superpowers, no one can take a punch. Each blow launches the punchee hundreds of feet into something destructible from which they later emerge unharmed. At no stage do the characters realise this and punching continues to be the attack method of choice throughout.

I was surprised to learn that one can get bored of seeing someone thrown into a building which then either explodes or slowly collapses. It’s never been tested before, but my limit appears to be eight.

Nor do characters develop as you might hope. Zod is angry, Clark is boring, Lois is inquisitive but keeps Clark’s secret for some reason, Clark’s mum is sad, Clark’s dad is cautious/heroic/dead. The Daily Planet staff work hard and forget to evacuate.

Possibly the most tortured and interesting character is in fact Jonathan Kent (Kevin Costner) who continuously warns his son against doing things which could reveal his powers – even if it means innocent people have to die. This dynamic looks to have potential until the poor man is killed while rescuing a dog from a tornado.

Martha must feel pretty guilty about sending him back for that dog…every time she looks into it’s little face…

Remarkably, with all the money thrown at this film there only seem to be a handful of people around when anything happens. Did the writers think we’d be confused by any more than that?

Examples: The FBI/army guy is in the arctic, then in Kansas driving a truck having a knife-fight, then flying a plane in Metropolis having a knife-fight.  Lois (Amy Adams) is summoned to Zod’s ship with Superman for no discernible reason, (unless it’s for the crime of wearing high-heels in a desert!) later she races faster-than-a-speeding-bullet to see Superman defeat Zod despite the duo covering hundreds of miles and destroying countless skyscrapers in their epic showdown. This is a battle only the main staff at The Daily Planet emerge to witness – in a city of millions.

The single most important role in humanity’s defence of earth is that of Token Scientist played by Richard Schiff. He immediately understands all of the alien technology as soon as he sees it. He is also omnipresent.

It would be easy to say ‘Henry Cavill is more a Man of Wood, than The Man of Steel‘ but in truth he wasn’t given anything to say. It’s astonishing that Christopher Nolan produced and contributed to the story as this could not be further from his Batman trilogy and I can’t see how they could combine the two characters for a future Justice League film without changes being made.

These are all minor details, but the single greatest insult to the viewing public – and yes I will take it as an insult – is the continuous, emotive music played from beginning to end. Imagine if the frazzled, discerning blockbuster audience were left to figure out how sympathetic they should be feeling or how excited they were supposed to be? It would end in disaster. The theme (good though it is) is played through every conversation, explosion and building collapse creating a fourth wall of noise which distracts and alienates the viewer. It’s papering over irreparable emotional cracks.

Snyder hasn’t learned anything from the new generation of superhero films. It’s got to be dark or funny at the very least, but this is all a bland, cacophonous haze with no hint of humour or depth. You cannot describe these as throwaway action films anymore, the ones that stand out will always be those where the effects are incidental and writing is key.

Once again, the problem with superhero franchises is that you know there will be a Man Of Steel II out in two years time. He’s not going to die in this one, nor will Lois Lane, so where’s the tension? They needed to create a compelling character and make it about them, keep Superman as far away from the plot as possible.

 

 

Click HERE to go to Floptajoe’s Top 10 Superhero Films

Trek3000

Two novice hikers trekking 3000kms for the Irish Heart Foundation. Follow us and our ups & downs, as we get used to long distance hiking on New Zealands, Te Araroa.

SIMPLE OBSERVATIONS OF EVERYDAY LIFE

Humorous Observations of Animals, People, Places, Things, and Popular Culture

Michael Cargill

Regular updates of sarcastic and irreverent nonsense.

Daniel is funny

Monsters, Jokes, Analogies

Cat the Beatnik

Mood swings ahead.

Pie and Biscuits

The good, the bad, the ugly and the downright ridiculous

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